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Create True And Lasting Love In Your Life

Ten Things To Find Love Now

You Can Find Love Right Now By Doing These Ten Things

1. Start by losing the losers

If you want to find your soul mate you must be available and not involved with people that aren’t right for you. Staying available is hard for a lot of singles, but necessary for finding the love of your life.

2. OK, available now? Next… are you “ready?”

Any unfinished business that might sabotage your next relationship? Legal, financial, emotional, kids, ex, employment? Get it handled!

3. Next, make a list of your top five “requirements”

Requirements are non-negotiable deal-breakers; what you must have or must not have in your relationship. Vow not to get involved with anyone that doesn’t meet all five. Share your list with your closest friends and make them swear to tell you the truth and lock you up if you get off-track.

4. Good job. Now, let’s get crystal clear about this “dating” thing:

If you want to avoid the deadly dating traps, focus on these Four Steps for Conscious Dating:

Step One: Scouting (find compatible people to meet- internet, through friends, getting out there, etc)

Step Two: Sorting (quickly determine if someone you meet has potential)

Step Three: Screening (collect enough information to know if your requirements would be met)

Step Four: Testing (date a few times and compare the reality with the information)

Repeat as needed.

That’s it… nothing more, nothing less. No “trial relationships,” no fun flings; just these four steps.

5. Get support

Don’t do this alone. Dating can be scary and isolating, and your friends and family can be your safety net to help you stay on track.

6. Work it!

Most people meet their soul mate through someone they already know, so let people know you’re looking and network like crazy.

7. Be positive and happy

Success breeds success and misery loves company… your choice.

8. Be the Chooser!

Go after what you want and don’t simply react to what or who chooses you.

9. Be assertive!

If you settle for less, you’ll get less. Ask for what you want and say “No” to what you don’t want.

10. Live a great life NOW while you’re single. “If you build it, they will come” (from the movie “Field of Dreams”).

Finding your perfect mate is a combination of working on yourself so that you’re ready to attract and keep this wonderful person, and being proactive in your life to go after what you want instead of waiting for it to come to you, or hoping it will just “happen.”

Friday January 6, 2012 By Debbie

How Your Fear Hold You Back From Love

Fear & Forgiveness: One More Step On The Journey To Love Last night’s session touched on some very difficult topics for me. 5 ½ years ago I terminated an unplanned pregnancy. My partner and I were not married and although we had regularly discussed marriage and he totally adores children my fears overwhelmed me and […]

Thursday January 5, 2012 By Debbie

Heartbreak To Happiness: The New Journey Begins

What does New Year’s mean to me? A Daring Promise Of Love At the start of every year many of us make resolutions, they might be to lose weight, eat healthier, get a better job… This year I have resolved to take better care of myself mentally. I have vowed to do whatever it takes […]

What Choices Are You Making With Your Love Life

Know What Holds You Back From Finding Love

Has love escaped you – time for a change

1. Be Smart About Who’s In Your Life (and Why).

Is there a man you’re considering letting get closer? Are you ready to date again, light up some sparks and flirt with someone new? Any relationship or dating that’s on the horizon will result in a much deeper, more effective connection if you’ve cultivated that joy and awareness mentioned above. Know what holds you back from finding love. Work through the questions below:

Do you consider yourself wise and trusting your own intuition when it comes to the relationships in your life? In other words, do the people you allow into your life reflect who you are and what you stand for? I’m not talking just about romantic love, but what about even your coworkers, friends and family?

And, of course, what about the men you date? What does it mean that you’ve allowed these particular individuals in? That you devote any of your time to them? Believe it or not, being intentionally conscious of your perspective on this has a great impact on who you connect with romantically, and even has an impact on your overall confidence.

Here’s another question: do your decisions, large and small, align with your core values? Do you act in your own best interest? Are you able to speak your truth and ask for what you really need with ease and confidence? Better yet, do you know for sure what you really need from a lasting relationship?

If you don’t develop this part of yourself, you’ll forever be in a cycle of feeling like the world isn’t listening to you. And all too often, an underlying frustration will be at the center of your universe. We all know how helpful that is, right?

Are there patterns you see? Destructive patterns? Repeat dating patterns that keep you single? Ways you sabotage or talk someone right out of loving you? Do you pick the same guy over and over again?

This week, take a little time out for yourself and start looking at the men you’ve invited into your life. Make a mental list of their qualities and what the relationship brought to you. Was it pain or joy? Did you feel seen or heard by them? Loved, cherished, adored and respected? Don’t restrict yourself. There’s no judgement here. Just a time to reevaluate.

Unless you are centered about your core values, know what you need, and stop repeating patterns you’ll have trouble getting what you want and need from a man, no matter how fantastic he is. It really is in your hands, and self-knowledge is the first step to getting what you most want.

2. Gain a Fresh Perspective: Flirting is Natural, Dating is Fun, and You Can Connect More Deeply with the Men You Meet.

Finally, I want you to know one thing: you already are an amazing woman. You have everything you need to have to meet the guy. There are really only two things that ever hold you back – 1) You are not ready 2) You don’t know how

We are all in different phases of our journey, and that is fine and perfectly healthy. The fact that you are here and reading my articles illustrates that you want more in life and in love. That means so much to me. You deserve all the joy and happiness you’re seeking, regardless of your relationship status at the moment. You deserve it simply because you are you!

Be sure to answer the questions above and find out where you are and how the answers will help you go forward. I am here if you need extra help.

Ready For Love?

Are You Ready For Love?

Getting to the heart of what holds you back.

If someone were to ask you what you really wanted from a relationship – what would the answer be?

It’s that time of year when not only are we busier at work than ever, but our personal lives are about to get busier as well! So many really wonderful women I know are juggling multiple commitments, and let’s face it, part of being successful and happy is being well-rounded. It’s only natural that we want to make the most of all the opportunities around us!

But one often overlooked aspect of “making the most” of our opportunities is cultivating a sense of joy, presence and awareness about ourselves. Your awareness is important because it keeps you from being caught up in a whirlwind of activity just for the sake of being busy or collecting accolades.

Sometimes you focus on or play up one particular part of your identity, while completely disregarding other parts of yourselves. You have many facets and dimensions. Time to look at all of them and express some of the ignored diemsions by enjoying them.

I want to encourage you to take a little time – and get clarity about who you are, and who and what you need in your life. This is the perfect time to examine this! No time like the present.

Knowing When Love Is Right For You

Don’t Date The Wrong Guy

Sometimes it can be hard to tell whether or not a new relationship is going to work out. It doesn’t help that you fall for people that end up being fundamentally wrong for you. So how do you tell whether the guy you’re with is someone who is right for you? To help ease the potential confusion, we have come up with three red flags that do a pretty good job at indicating you may be dating the wrong guy.

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You have different life goals

One of the biggest and most important indicators that your dating the wrong guy is that you see future life goals differently – they just don’t match up. It’s not about the personal short term goals, like the fact that he’s saving for a new car and you’ve decided to change jobs. It’s the long range big, life – changing -type goals. For example, if you know you want kids and he doesn’t – you have a huge difference in what you want. Or, if he plans on eventually moving back to his (tiny, middle-of-nowhere) home town and you can’t stand the thought of living anywhere but the city, then this will create a huge gap between the two of you somewhere down the road. You have to get really clear on what you need from a relationship and find out what you are willing to compromise on. The key is to know if the one you’re dating is not budging on areas where you are not able to compromise. They are your deal breakers.

You never really talk

Women really feel a deep connection when they are listened to and understood. It is an extremely validating experience. There is also another piece to that in that the guy you are dating must be able to open up and share his thoughts while you listen. That is what sustains a relationship over time. Contrary to widespread belief, sex is only one part of a healthy relationship. Look for ways to open up deep, meaningful conversations and engage in enriching discussions where you share perspectives. This goes a long way in a relationship and actually deepens the physical intimacy between the two of you. Conversation – the real kind where you discuss feelings and hopes and dreams – is a key ingredient to building a lasting bond with someone. If you don’t have those open honest heart-felt sharing conversations – ever – you’re not in the right relationship. As much as it’s a physical connection, a good relationship should also allow you to connect on a deeper emotional level. The key here is to see if the guy you are dating is able to connect on an emotional level. If not, in the long run this is a hige deal breaker.

He doesn’t like your family and friends and vice versa

If none of your family and friends like him, or he doesn’t get along with any of the people you hold dear, you could be wasting your time. The same goes for his family and friends. You don’t need to like or get along with all of them, but if trying to ignore thsi issue will never make it go away. Now of course we are all drawn to certain people and have become used to the way are own familes likes and dislikes. Just make sure that you know what you are getting yourself into. One of the best parts of being in a relationship that makes you happy is combining your closest circle with his. That doesn’t mean you no longer have separate friends or do things without one another, but having dinner parties with both of your favorite people makes things so much easier. Having to entirely separate your life as a couple from your family and friend puts a strain on the relationship. The key is to know yourself well enough to see where this could cause problems in the relationship. Know if it is a deal breaker for you.

Making the decision that someone is wroing is never eay. Try to take some time to really understand what you need from a relationship. Is it being a priority, fun, commitment, physical affection, etc – no matter what you have to find someone that is able to meet those needs and vice versa for them That is the key to being happy in a relationship!

Can 20 Minutes Change Your Love Life?

Ten Things To Find Love Now

You Can Find Love Right Now By Doing These Ten Things

How Your Fear Hold You Back From Love

Heartbreak To Happiness: The New Journey Begins

Online Dating Profile Redo